Theives and Hooligans

So. I lost my job.
Yep.
Its not surprising, I am beginning to become quite adept at losing my job.
I Went into work and had breakfast, afterwards was told that i had to get two people signed up to The Wilderness Society today or i would be fired.
Well, shit
Id only ever got 2 or more once, The odds werent high. I however went to work confident i could do it. This was the day that i was going to prove that i could keep this job. My heart swelled with pride in my work, ready for a new day!
Yeah. that lasted for an hour. Its sort of hard to keep up morale when every second person said that they would be dead before it mattered to them. Also we have these ipads that are supposed to help us put down peoples details but when i got someone wanting to sign up the ipad didnt work and she didnt have time.
Jesus why have you forsaken me so?
By 3pm i had pretty much given up and had begun just saying anything to get people to stop. Not a soul was stopping for my devilish good looks. So i decided to climb a tree.

James would try to stop people on the street by asking them whether they want Cameron to lose his home. I would then follow it up by shouting nature facts at them and trying to get them to stop.
Suprisingly it didn't work. At all.
I mean come on. There is a dude up a tree surely that is worth stopping for! So as you can see everyone walked past while i dined on leaves. No one cares about the humble tree hippy. I told one man if he didn't help save the endangered tree hippy there would be less hippies in the trees and more in the cities making the place smell.
I am one hell of a salesman.
So yeah, end of the day came and i had no sales. a bit of a quick end to a new job but well.. thats how it seems to go here.
The bright side of this is that i finally have enough money to get my busking license. I've paid for everything and i was told i had to show up at ten on monday. It also said that all members of the act must be there so i wrenched james from his bed so that he and i could perform for the bureaucrats. They weren't there at ten then moved it to twelve and didn't show up then because they had actually got the date wrong. Its next Monday which is frustrating because thats another week of performance that i cant get paid for.
I feel that i should probably go on strike due to these ridiculous work conditions. I imagine if i sit on the side of the road with a sign saying "The Melbourne Local Government are sort of pricks" I would get more money than actually busking.
We went busking this morning for about 2 hours and made a solid $3.50 It might have something to do with the fact that we were just improvising and between us we didn't know one song fully. But my primary school teacher told me that the fact i tried was what counts so i don't feel so bad.
Or atleast i did until i realised i was working for 90 cents and hour then i was like "daymn ms winter why you gotta be so wrong?" and she was like "Well daymn Cameron that doesn't really apply to modern life. All i was trying to do was make you feel better about the fact that your pirate ship in art class looked more like a turd than a nautical vessel"  Then i was all like "Thanks for your insight you bitch. Why are you even in my subconcious?" and she be all like " Repressed sexual tension probably" and then she vanished.

OH also these are pictures of my flat. Its pretty sweet.

Its a really nice place. Its like 30 mins to town and 5 minutes to the nearest Aldi (supermarket) They sell bottles of wine for $2.50 its nuts.
We also live next to a river. It has a rather large bridge over it and we took some pictures there.

I actually set my goatee on fire doing this picture. Instead of the goatee ending in a straight line at the bottom, one corner is singed into a curve. It looks more ridiculous than it did before.

 The video is well on its way! we have been getting some wonderful footage and soon i'll have a little portfolio video! :)
So i'd like to think i have a high tolerance to alcohol but as these things go you never know how often your toes touch the line until you go past it.
So I went on a date with a girl i had met at my old work, Grill'd, It started out well. The conversation flowed and we sunk some beer while yarning away outside. We had a few jugs at that place before leaving to find a park to chill out in. we bought a six pack and started drinking that.
It was around the fourth time i'd taken a leak in 20 minutes that i realised that i was actually pretty trashed. The girl i was with was an ardent feminist, vegan and general all round lefty. So in my eyes a pretty cool cat but the problem with finding someone that cares about this stuff as much as you do is that they know all the things you do and will pull you up on every fallacy you make.
My usual ease at talking spiraled down into a neverending cycle of bad sterotypes and just generally not finishing sentences.
When i was among the drunkest i was that day she started asking me why i wasn't vegan.
I knew it was coming, hell she told me she would talk about it at the start of the date, but boy i wasn't at all prepared.
She told me all the reasons why i couldn't be an enviromentalist while not being vegan and damn was she convincing. When it comes to discussing veganism Vegans have all the arguements. All of them.
I couldn't really do anything but agree. The only thing i bleated was something along the lines of "Meats pretty good though. A bit of meat never hurt anyone"
My face sort of sunk into the realistion of what i had said and she wasn't pleased.
But Cameron how do you get yourself out of this situation?
AH! i have the perfect line!
"look.. i'd like fully turn vegan for you. Cos like i should do it anyway yeah. i'd do it for you"
"That is possibly the worst reason you could ever have chosen to turn vegan. Thats really fucking weird too. what the fuck"

It was a pretty good date i'd say. I made some strong impressions. Made some strides in the dating field. Crashed and burnt worse than i have ever done before.
I crack the fuck up when i think about it. Whats done is done, but i still wish i had a little more style that day.

Graffiti is pretty sweet here.

Anyway Thats all i remember i wanted to write about.
Oh i was doing poi at the train station today and there was a bunch of school kids on the other platform watching me. When i stopped they applauded and hollered. IT was pretty cool i havent been applauded by a group that big in a while.
It was pleasant.

Anyway. thats the end.
If you want to read my flatmates blogs here they are.

Eric was once named Martha Stuarts number one fan by an internet poll on MSN.com. 93% of votes came from one IP address but Eric still claims he won by popular consensus. His hobbies include buying from Coles, picking up fine ladies and generally having one of the most bitching smiles this side of Tanzania.
http://wavesofoz.blogspot.com.au/

James has never once accepted that clouds are not solid and still claims that the problem is that no one has ever tried. He enjoys photography, nude modelling and crack. Also well known for his ability to make the same joke about my accent weekly.
http://xeyesandpeacesigns.blogspot.com.au/


Seeya guys!

Just sayin...

A skateboarder is coming towards you.
He is moving much quicker than you  and his body is leaning right. He hasnt started turning yet what do you do?
A. Do nothing
B. Move out of his way.
C. Move into his way.
D. All of the above.

The correct answer is A. It is always fucking A. I cannot move past you if you move in ways that defy my comprehension. Just keep walking dont worry. I will not ever hit you. I have never hit someone but i become dangerously close to doing so if you start trying to figure out where i am going to go.
I understand that if you are a B person you want to do whats best for you and me. give me more space thats cool thanks for that but unless there are people blocking the whole path chances are i don't need it.
I literally only take the space a person would if I was walking past. I  dont really mind Bs they are pretty cool cats. It is really really funny when people give me the whole footpath to go past. i've had two people actually walk on the road while i went past.
Chill out folks.
Cs are just endlessly frustrating. Often this happens when i am coming behind you and you move to get out of my way
WITHOUT LOOKING BEHIND YOU.
How....? Like.. i just don't even comprehend what is going through the head of this person. Do you cross roads without looking? Do look to see whether a toilet is occupied before going in? do you look while you shave nuts or do you enjoy a ballsack that resembles a plucked and butchered chicken?
This makes no goddamn sense.
But D.
You might have thought D was a joke option but oh, it is not.
A skateboarder is in the distance about 100-150 metres away. There is no one else on the footpath. Moving out of the way of the skateboarder passes your mind. but you think you will wait for a second and just do what you were doing.
Walking straight.
All of a sudden he's near well his body is leaning right and he is pointing with both hands to the right. as he starts to turn you realise he must mean he wants you to go right because he is a dickhead who orders people around the pavement.
You move right.
He scowls and pulls left.
Now is your chance. Move left immediately! There isn't much time to block him!
Hes moving right! Take one step to the right but actually move left! Good. now you are anticipating what the boarder will do!
I swear to god i wish everyone who does this tried the same in traffic.

As you can tell i had a few annoyances today.

In other news Colorado and Washington legalised Cannabis.
When i was told i didn't even know what to think. It was sort of weird. i didn't feel anything. I knew it was going to happen sometime, that it was only a matter of time but i dunno... perhaps it hasn't hit me yet.
What i was really really happy with in regards to this was that this will pave the way for latin america to legalise and greatly diminish the profits of the cartels. So many lives will be saved. This really is a pretty awesome milestone.
Oh also Obama won. Who would've seen that coming eh?
Also in the same genre of story this is the funniest shit ever
http://therealnews.com/t2/component/hwdvideoshare/?task=viewvideo&video_id=74939

I signed one person up to the wilderness society.
I have a few pitches that i use to stop people.
The first i thought up was
" if you had a hundred year old tree how much would you sell it for?"
(answer)
"how does 6 bucks sound to you? reasonable?"
(answer)
"because thats how much the australian government sells it for"
and then go into the whole spiel.
Another is
"I like to poison the rivers in my spare time do you think the government should subsidise me?"
But lately i've realised that most people don't even hear what i say the first time i say it and i need to keep it simple so today i was saying
"do you know what trees are?"
It was james' idea. The absurdity of the question either gets people to stop or makes them laugh which keeps me happy which makes me better at my job.

Yeah. Not alot happened today. I just wanted to say what was on my mind.
Seeya dudelbugs

Whats happened lately?

So. i went to my interview for the conservation job and next morning got a call saying i got the job.
It was a good start to the day. Its funny. I don't believe i've ever not passed an interview. Its pretty cool. Also friends have arrived.

Eric is a dude from Quebec who was friends with James and i got to know through League of Legends. He once professed his undying love for Martha Stuart. He smells funny.

This is James. I havent seen him in like 4 years. Reunions and shit. its cool yo.
He plays a mad ukelele. Seriously that shit is nuts. You should hear it. You would probably like it.

They've been around Aussie for the past month but have just come down from working at building a hostel around Cairns. It sounded awesome. Really warm, getting trashed, not paying for rent and just relaxing. Yeah sounds fairly ideal.

Yeeeah so i've been really busy. I wrote that draft weeks ago.
During the time in which i was writing it i was working at grill'd and worked 12 days straight. It wasn't fun at all and i was hating life at that point. we had the whole house to ourselves for 10 days straight and didnt do anything with it because i was working all the time. Eric and James managed to get a job almost immediately. It was selling these midas cards which gave you a whole heap of shit for not too much but going door to door to sell shit from 10 am till sometimes even 10 pm was absolutely nuts and drained both of them to the point they quit and got new jobs. 
Eric got a job at a call center and James got the same job as me.

This is the best job of my life. I swear to god, it is so relaxed. I am paid more than I ever have before, to get people to help save the environment. I have always wanted to work for a cause and what better cause than the preservation of our ecosystem.
I talk to so very many people, some are wonderful some not so. Recently I talked to a man who told me that there is really, no point to saving this planet it is merely a stopping place til the divine.
What the fuck
Its has been some time since I was an angsty atheist who hated all things religious, I can see the good that can come from it. Most of that comes from the part that you love gods creations, ya know, the earth, animals, other human beings, you know gods treasured creations.

Nope. The fact the god created this world for us to nurture and thrive doesnèt even cross the mans mind as he tells me yet again that good deeds don't save your soul only faith does.

Now i wouldn't profess to be a christian in any sense, but it really pains me to meet christians that i am a better christian than.

I talked to a man who blamed the jews for the destruction of the forests, the rivers, erosion, financial crisis, and sexual promiscuity in the youth. He was a colourful character.

The good, however, far outweighed the bad i have talked to so many people horribly concerned about the fate of the enviroment and just generally lovely people.

One old man jumped out of the car just near me and we greeted eachother and he asked me how old i was, 20, then told me he was 81 and that at this age a good day starts when he "can look down and see that his cock hasn't shrivled up and died" I love old people like that. None of this bullshit false politeness, The "i'm fucking old i can say whatever i want kind of old person"

I could gush for days about my job but I will save you from that by saying its pretty mean bro

we have a place to live!
Ill post some pictures of it soon. I have had problems with trying to have use of the Internet for more than five minutes and failed in my mission. This is why I've been not posting for such a time (and been horribly hard to contact, sorry!) but now that we are stable, out of that fucking hostel and into a flat I can start living with a smidgen of normality.
We signed the bond today. On the way there the landlord ( who is wonderfully nice) talked about the possibility that one of our flatmates does weed.
Oh dear lord guys lock your door and hide your kids you could be living with reefer zombie!
Yeah she said she knew people overdosed on it which put me in the awkward position of really really wanting to prove her wrong but knowing this person owns my house.
For once I remained silent.
We did also talk about our landlord has a bidar (innovative bi sensing technology) and a some other rather funny shit. She has some pretty good yarns.

James has been taking shittons of pictures of me and so you will the quality of pictures on this blog absolutely skyrocket because James is taking all the pictures and doing a fucking good job at it.
We've been out firedancing and taking picture of it. its been pretty sweet we got some good pictures out of it:

I know a whole bunch has happened but at the same time nothing too great has actually been happening.

I've been giving bracelets to people that i meet briefly. I lost the original bracelet i was given. I was quite cut up about that but hey. easy come easy go. It started a trend and thats whats important.

More posts will come now that i am actually in a flat and have some internet. i'm sorry the post isn't all that great but this is just to say to people that yes i am actually alive! and i'm having a great time.

Have wonderful lives people!

Cam